A Good Plodder On-er

This weekend was my husband’s birthday. He loves to go to London, he loves concerts, eating out etc. I love music but crowds, loud places, flashing lights and a change to routine are very stressful for autistic me. ADHD me thinks “Wow a new thing, doing something different Yay!!”. This leads to very conflicted feelings about trips but also doing things with my husband and making him happy are very important to me. He had planned an amazing trip seeing ABBA voyage and going to the comedy club, we even fit in the Barbie movie.

The first thing is scheduling. Obviously I can’t change my husband’s birthday but making sure I’m not stressing out about missing a long run makes for a more harmonious trip. Trying to fit in 20miles before the day starts (which I have done more than once on family holidays) is not the best start to the day. Keeping two kids entertained in a different environment when we are all supposed to be “having fun” is hard enough without sleep deprivation and aching muscles. In this case it worked out well as I have a 100k ultra next weekend so I am tapering (reducing miles) in preparation anyway.

Whenever we go away I try to do my run before my husband/family get up. This means their day is minimally disturbed although when I get lost and return late it can have more of an impact than intended. Of course I never think I will get lost “this time”, and then I do. Yesterday I only had 5 miles to do which is under an hour even at my pace so very doable before we get going. In London it is doubly important if you are staying anywhere near the centre as by 10am tourists are making running nearly impossible. The best time is early when the only people out are runners and workers with commuters adding to the mix on weekdays. On a weekday I plan to finish before 9am but on a weekend 10am will do which means you don’t need too early a start even for a longer run. As you can see from the photos of Trafalgar square and the South Bank taken yesterday morning it is lovely and quiet. It was also beautifully clear and sunny and not hot so an added bonus.

The next decision is where to run. I do love the London parks but the biggest challenge there for me is getting lost. I was thinking about this blog when I was running in London thinking about how it is impossible to get lost using my usual route, and then I got lost. Fortunately not properly lost. There was a map I found and then worked out where I was and got back to the hotel with minimal delay. Even so I will share my “fail proof” route plan as it usually works. We usually stay in the same Travelodge in Leicester square, or one just off it so I know where I am at the start. I run down towards Waterloo which is the station we always come in on so a very familiar route. I then run along the Thames South Bank. I run back the same way or if it is getting a bit busy cross the river and run back along the North Bank where there are less tourists. Really simple, nice flat and easy, lovely iconic views, (nearly) impossible to go wrong.

My husband loves to organise, which is just as well because funnily enough he does not like to live in the chaos that I do. He knows what we are doing, when we are doing it and how to get there. He will have booked trains, hotels, events and planned the whole thing. That is an amazing thing for both autistic me and ADHD me. I like things to be organised and planned but I am rubbish at doing it. I don’t need to worry about getting on the wrong train or that I forgot to book tickets. This means the only things I have to cope with is the people, the noise and occasional unexpected flashing lights. When you are on a train and you know someone else will tell you when you need to get off you can put your earphones in, play a podcast loud and go somewhere else in your brain. I did this on the tube and in the arena before the ABBA concert started. Once the concert started I changed my earphones for really effective earplugs. I could still hear everything but it was much quieter. When you are with someone you can trust you can close your eyes when things get overwhelming and my husband does not get embarrassed when I do odd vocal or physical tics or stims. He does not care if we get stared at. This meant I was able to enjoy the concert.

We also always make sure to have plenty of downtime. Just doing nothing, playing mindless games on my phone, watching Netflix etc in the hotel room between periods of being outside in the world makes everything easier.

Often the worst thing about a trip like this is the anticipation. In this case I had an antidote to pre trip anxiety, my son. He was staying in London to work at a film festival but was free both evenings. We went out with him both nights and took him to London Comedy club to see the Comedy Store Players on Sunday evening. We have been there more times than I can remember, we usually sit on the same chairs. I know the layout of the building, the format of the show etc but it was great to take my son there although maybe sitting next to your Mum for some of the jokes might have been a bit cringey for him. Before I went I just concentrated on the fact I was seeing him which was so exciting it distracted me from the rest.

I am glad to be back home with my daughter and the dogs now but so glad we went. Very different to next weekend when I will be running through the countryside in my happy place. This weekend I spent with people who make me very happy which is a different kind of wonderful.